Fuzzy Math

C: What a mess. On Kinda Sorta Super Tuesday Obama wins Vermont. Clinton wins Ohio and Rhode Island. Contrary to popular belief and shoddy press reporting Tejas is a wash, not a win for Clinton, because of the convoluted Primary/Caucus WTF methodology to designate delegates. What does this mean? It means Democrats are doing their damnest to screw up the easiest Presidential walkoff homerun in ages. Hilary cannot win based on standard delegate count. Barack can sort of win based on the same criteria. Imagine Florida and Michigan get to play kickball again and Clinton squeaks by on pledged delegates, but super delegates have swung to Obama. Obamaniacs freak out and don't want to vote in the national election because Hope dies with Obama. Or the other way around. Or a brokered convention? Or it comes down to Puerto Rico's game changing swing status? Can you imagine Clinton and Obama duking it out in the be all, end all San Juan debate? Geezus H. Kringle on a Cracker. Oh wait, Dems argue about foreign policy credentials and advertising.

McCain is the Republican nominee, much to the shock of establishment Republicans and the Christian Wing. Bush, the President with the lowest approval rating since Calvin Coolidge or Beelzebub, endorses him. The stock market is getting crushed, oil hits $105 a barrel, the dollar is embarrassing in its global worth, gold near a $1,000 an ounce, the housing/mortgage mess and the Chinese are poisoning our children AND they have the Olympics. (Thank you Nixon and Kissinger.) They may be a couple of Wars going on somewhere. But McCain is maybe giggling with hope that the Democrats may be commiting ritual suicide in a circular firing squad. James Carville is pulling his hair screaming, "It's the economy, stupid!". Oh wait, nevermind.

And Huckabee might get his own talkshow.

Big Weirdness rules the Day.

J: First off, I need to get this off my chest: there is nothing hard to understand about how Texas' Democratic primary works. It's a vote, then a caucus. Two thirds of the delegates are apportioned by the vote, the other third are divided up via caucus results. And you can't caucus unless you voted in the primary. That is not a difficult process to understand. Really, it's not. I just explained it in three sentences.

Second, I am really getting more irate than usual with the state of journalism in this Nation. Delegates at the National Conventions are what makes candidates. It's not votes, it's not States won, it's not anything other than delegates. Senator Clinton's "huge, Earth-shattering, momentum-disrupting" victory on Tuesday gained her, by my math, four delegates. Senator Obama was leading by about 144 before, and about 140 today. Watching the confetti fall reminded me of a wide reciever doing his convoluted touchdown dance... when his team is down 48-13 in the 4th quarter. Any losses to Senator Obama's lead will easily be made up in Wyoming on Saturday and Mississippi on Tuesday.

Now, let's look at the GOP. Senator McCain got his magic number, and immediately went to the White House on Wednesday. Wise move- he had to have his moment with President Bush to satisfy the 23%ers, he did, and I think that's the last time you'll see those two men together until the election. Get it out of the way early, and get it behind you.

Governor Huckabee has put himself in an interesting place. He's probably not going to be the Vice-Presidential nominee, but his concession prize is stepping into the role formerly held be Ralph Reed, James Dobson, Pat Robertson, and Jerry Falwell- he's America's Christian Political leader- even if he doesn't know it yet. I don't think this is a bad thing necessarily. After all, Huckabee brings something to the table that none of his predecessors had- a sense of humor. That will be an interesting twist to watch in the weeks and months to come.

Big Weirdness indeed.

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