Romney is toast

C: Imagine a scenario where Willard can win? Not New Hampshire, they hate Massachutsean tourists. South Carolina? No way, the Geezus Wing of the Republican Party is fullon Huckabee, McCain has the other half despite the Max Clelanding he got the last go round. Michigan? I do not know, but I suspect the Rust Belt ain't going to buy his flip-flop gay loving/hating game. February 5th could be embarrassing. No one wants to say it out loud, but suspicious eyebrows are raised when "Mormon" is uttered around America. Maybe Mitt saved the Olympics, but you can be sure the Tabernacle Choir got some new robes out of the deal. Me, I have no mormonic issues. A boss of mine was one of "them". He didn't drink booze or coffee, but he cursed liked a pirate and he'd always buy rounds of booze at lunch meetings for us degenerates. Then there was that chick in Vegas I dated for a month. Yowee. Anyway, I saw something entertaining on CNN this morning. Anecdotal blah blah says that the other Republican candidates don't like the Mittster. And that is goddam funny.

J: The amusing thing here is that Mitt seems to be the ideal Republican candidate. He's got money, he's got faith, he's got good hair. It's just that his version of God differs from the mainstream Republican view. In other times, this would not be a problem, but we're in 2008, not 1960. And he's a Republican, rather than a Democrat. Therefore, this is a factor.

I almost feel sorry for Willard. He's doing everything the playbook says he should, it's just not working.From a policy standpoint, he's pretty centrist. Conservative, but not hyper- conservative.

Dammit, the man should be electable.

He's not, though. The Republican party knows why.

C: Remind me next election cycle to buy a TV station in Iowa or New Hampshire. The ad buys from Willard, and the future gillionaire who thinks highly of himself, alone could have and will set me up in the South of France with a frisky topless supermodel who'll open up my wine bottles and slice up the really good cheese.